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May 17 to be our country's annual Clitoridectomy Day. Gynecologists, dentists and TV repairmen throughout the country will begin performing this surprisingly economical procedure on potential harlots throughout America without charge or warning.

Well, this administraton already does things even more unbelievable...
By: ZiB
Sunday, May 8th 2005 (6:20pm)
His mission is so stereotypically ultra-right-wing, it sounds like a liberal joke: repeal environmental protection laws. Dismantle the EPA. Teach creationism in public schools. Have the ten commandments tattooed on every citizens ass. Abolish separation of church and state. Outlaw abortion. Pass the flag burning amendment. Spend billions on SDI. Shut down the federal government. Crucify Clinton.

I give you... Tom Delay
By: timmy242
Monday, Apr 18th 2005 (12:15pm)
(more)   [Comments: 0]
All the guy did was state the truth....in a state that is famous for its racist brewery....and wingnut professors (who are protected by the 1st amendment, nonetheless)....and numerous cults... What's the big deal? Besides, the white dude "regrets it."
By: Mr._Dog
Friday, Apr 1st 2005 (7:23am)
As the president travels to Europe, here's a few points he should make while visiting.
By: boho-daddy
Tuesday, Feb 22nd 2005 (6:48am)
...but I actually respect something Dubya said concerning drugs. During a convo that was "secretly taped," G-Dubby stated that he doesn't want "little kids" doing the pot because he did. Kudos, Mr. President. Now let us grown-ups have our fun, dammit.
By: scooter1979
Monday, Feb 21st 2005 (10:59am)
(more)   [Comments: 1]
...and if this post doesn't prove it, you need to wash your political party's clotted jackass sperm outta yer gourd and slap yourself 'toopid.

Howard Dean, the new DNC chairman, and upcoming presidential hopeful, fancies himself a comedian! How? Well, at the 'oh-so sensitive' expense of the eternally fickle, P.C., minority legions that would absolutely shit bloody havok if ANY Republican were to utter the very same phrase.

So whats the hubbub, bub? You tell me... here's AOL/Time Warner's daily, thought-provoking rally-maker of a gem on Dean (sufficiently pre-chewed, of course, for the brains-on-training-wheels hippie folk among you) - and here's the original article submission of the day (that was ultimately yanked and found cached away by Google before the media dog-waggers got a chance to sink their teeth into old AOL/Time Warner and run with it).

This ultimately poses the question of "WHO told WHOM to yank the original publicized article before replacing it with something more... 'Democratically palatable'?" Hmmmm.... give ya three guesses. Oh yeah, and the first two don't count...
By: Hellvis
Thursday, Feb 17th 2005 (12:03am)
(more)   [Comments: 7]
Well, maybe that's not confirmed, but the Norwegians think so.
By: scooter1979
Saturday, Jan 22nd 2005 (2:44pm)
Welcome to the second term. Wonder what's in store this time around?
By: Dave
Friday, Jan 21st 2005 (6:48am)
in the White House?

Were I a Texan instead of a Yankee, I'd be voting for this guy!
By: Mr._Dog
Wednesday, Jan 19th 2005 (3:40pm)
According to pollster Rockwell Pritchard, the surging popularity of suicide bodes ill for both Sen. Clinton and Sen. Kerry as potential presidential candidates in 2008.
By: boho-daddy
Saturday, Jan 8th 2005 (4:16am)
This could open a big can of worms.
By: J20
Monday, Dec 27th 2004 (9:22am)
We are a coalition of former friends and co-workers of Ann Coulter who are upset by her vicious anti-gay, anti-muslim, anti-feminist rhetoric and feel the truth should be told. Our organization, Strap-On Veterans For Truth, is dedicated to exposing the true past of America’s number one hatemonger.

Ann Coulter is actually a former drag queen from Key West named Pudenda Shenanigans.
By: Dave
Tuesday, Nov 23rd 2004 (5:56am)
Thought you've seen it all, eh? Partisan politics your bag then? Bet you haven't checked out the Whitehouse.Org! Ah, satire and politics...one of my favorite meat pies. Enjoy! (Not for the right of center...)
By: timmy242
Tuesday, Nov 16th 2004 (11:39pm)
Wow, something motivated me to brush off the cob webs and make a post. That said, I just got done watching 911: In Plane Sight by The Power Hour and 911: The Great Illusion. These documentaries make movies like Threads and Sum of All Fears look like Night of the Living Dead compared to Faces of Death.

After cleaning my display and keyboard of various excrements, naturally I went straight to www.ImpeachBush.com . It was there that I realized this capitalistic place still made some sort of sense, and that all was not lost yet.

Serious people, buy, borrow, or otherwise obtain these DVD's. If you still feel safe afterwards, THIS site should help you get in the right frame of mind for the ride ahead. (convenient domain...and note that it's copyright Library of Congress.)

Be YOUR OWN judge of who's doing the brain washing or grab a pair of shears and wait.
By: ZiB
Saturday, Nov 13th 2004 (10:36pm)
It's showtime.

Go vote. We NEED a mandate in this country.

Find out where to go, and get it done.
By: Dave
Tuesday, Nov 2nd 2004 (12:24am)
Two politicians... One house... One scary-ass game of The Sims.
By: scooter1979
Monday, Nov 1st 2004 (6:06pm)
Thinking of voting intependant, like, say, for Nader? Miffed that he wasn't included in the debates? Well fret no more, because now you can watch Ralphie face off with Bush and Kerry on DVD!
By: Dave
Saturday, Oct 30th 2004 (7:37pm)
If the world could vote for our president, who would they pick?
By: Dave
Tuesday, Oct 26th 2004 (6:46am)
(more)   [Comments: 1]
Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, cats and squirrels, get it here before you get it in email from everyone you know and everyone they know! The dudes from JibJab who brought you "This Land" (if you haven't seen it, welcome to your first day online...) have made their triumphant return (sure to be over-distributed, but remember, you saw it here first!!!)!

We give to you... drumroll, bitches...

Good To Be In DC!
By: scooter1979
Friday, Oct 8th 2004 (7:33am)
This is not being posted as a game, or just another reason to get smashed. This is being posted as a public service. You see, extensive testing at Davelog Labs has shown that the only way to swallow tonight's, umm, "debate," is to swallow lots of booze. And, in staying with the theme of "Choice" in this election season, we offer you the choice of two services. Drink up America!

Public Service #1 | Public Service #2
By: scooter1979
Thursday, Sep 30th 2004 (3:11pm)
By definition, a debate is a free exchange of ideas and questions. Too bad that has no bearing whatsoever on the dog and pony show we'll get treated to tomorrow night. Check out these Top 10 Secrets They Don't Want You To Know About the Debates, and then weep for democracy... because it ain't happening here, bub.
By: Dave
Wednesday, Sep 29th 2004 (11:37am)
Black Box Voting has uncovered some disturbing things about the new Diebold voting system that will be used in more than 30 states - the data stores use an MS Access database which can be modified with Notepad, hidden programs within the system specifically for vote manipulation, and possibly most disturbing, that a chimpanzee can erase the trail of accountability just by mashing on the keyboard.

I strongly suggest voting absentee - at least then, there's a paper trail. There WILL be challenges to whatever outcome this election produces.
By: Dave
Friday, Sep 24th 2004 (6:24am)
pulp/'pelp/n. 1. A soft, moist, shapeless mass of matter.

politician/'werm/n. 1. A sketchy, slimy, spineless mass of matter.

A film (not) by Quentin Tarantino:

Pulp Politicians
By: scooter1979
Monday, Sep 20th 2004 (6:48pm)
Thursday

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