The fish live.
Two months after Crofton's snakehead infestation became an international sensation, one month after a panel of experts picked its poison to flush the fish from the pond, and almost two weeks after an herbicidal cocktail was sprayed over the water, the fish are still biting. THEY JUST WON'T DIE!!!
Thursday, Sep 5th 2002 (12:04am)
While Keiko the killer whale frolicked in a western Norwegian fjord Tuesday, a local whale expert warned that Keiko may not survive the winter. If he doesn't detach himself from humans soon, it may be best to destroy him, he said. Nice sentiment, killing the whale 'for his own good', but I suspect the REAL reason they want him dead is because he's fucking up the local salmon industry.
Wednesday, Sep 4th 2002 (12:01am)
With Bonsai Kitten, a world of variation awaits you, limited only by your own imagination. By physically constraining the growth of a developing living thing, it can be directed to take the shape of the vessel that constrains it. Just as a topiary gardener produces bushes that take the forms of animals or any other thing, you no longer need be satisfied with a housepet having the same mundane shape as all other members of its species.
By: Some Nobody
Thursday, Aug 29th 2002 (4:51pm)
Earlier this week we reported on the dreaded snakehead fish invasion - if you still need more information about this voracious amphibious killing machine, here's some snakehead facts from the knowledgable folks at the Onion.
Wednesday, Jul 31st 2002 (12:23am)
The latest predator threat to mankind is the ferocious amphibious snakehead fish - with its slavering fangs of death and voracious appetite, surely our time on this planet as the dominant species is winding down. Of course, the people in Singapore think we're just overreacting doodooheads.
Monday, Jul 29th 2002 (12:19am)
A giraffe suspected of killing a US pastor at a luxury Kenyan hotel jumped to his death from a cliff after resisting attempts to examine its hooves for bloodstains, the hotel manager said on Wednesday.
Friday, Jun 28th 2002 (12:16am)
Is Buzzy getting a little portly? Then join Fly-BMI, the online community for owners of obese houseflies. At this site you can calculate your fly's Body Mass Index (BMI) and ascertain whether or not your houseflies are overweight or merely vertically challenged.
Friday, Jun 7th 2002 (12:03am)
We want to prove that every country in the world has at least one live chicken in it. So far we have photographic evidence from people we trust in 9 countries. Click on the chicken if you don't believe us!
Thursday, Jun 6th 2002 (12:11am)
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