Happy Sunday, everyone! Thanks to the miracle of pre-programmed articles, the site's being automatically posted to while I'm on a little pilgrimage in the woods... I've been gone all weekend and you didn't even know it! Don't be thinking you can break into my pad and hork my shit, though - we didn't feed the cats before we left, and they have switchblades. Anyway, let us commence with the weekly dredging of the religious side of the web!
Jeez, that was terrible. I'd have come up with a better joke, but I'm too busy sitting barefoot in a tree playing the flute. Have some links to take the sting off that miserable bit of holy humor:
Hindu Sacrifice · Satanic Hamsterdance · Atheist Radio
Robot Of God · Holy Sock Song · Inflatable Jesus
Sunday, Aug 4th 2002 (12:38am)
Football season is comin', but until that glorious first kickoff of the pre-season, I have nothing better to do with my Sundays than rehash all the religious crap I've wandered across in the past week. Hunker down, because here it comes!
Pat Buchanan, Mao Tse-Tung, and Bill Gates were called to the carpet by God. God informed them that he was very unhappy about what was going on in this world. Since things were so bad, he told the three that he was destroying the Earth in 3 days. God told them that there was nothing they could do to alter his decision, but they would be allowed to return to their homes and businesses and tell their friends and colleagues what was happening.Wow, that joke really stunk. Oh Well. Redeem thyself for the remainder of thy day with thy sacred linkage:
Rock 'Em Sock 'Em Rabbis · Christian Hackers · Wall Street Heathens
Jesuits kidnap Uncle Sam · Mormon Underwear · Prayer Panties
David Hasslehoff Is The Antichrist · GLAD Magazine
Sunday, Jul 28th 2002 (12:28am)
Time once again for the weekly religion roundup, where I lay upon thee all the God stuff I've come across over the course of the week - Let's get it on!
Death Sentence For Blasphemer | The Hugging Saint | God's Littlest Lambs
Sunday, Jul 21st 2002 (12:06am)
It's that time of the week again - time to get on your knees or bend over a table or whatever... Sunday is upon us. Let's do it!
Yes, I know, weak joke and picture this week, but I'm a busy guy. We have an assload of holy links, so let's go:
Spittin' Jesus | Jesus Continuum | Jesus Balloon
Bible According to Cheese | God Doesn't Give a Shit About NASCAR
2002 Jesus Values Excellence Awards
Sunday, Jul 14th 2002 (1:06am)
And the Lord said, "let there be gassy food".
And there was gassy food (Taco Bell).
And the Lord said, "go forth and tell the sheep of the land of this gassy food".
And they went forth.
And the Lord said, "make sure they get the point."
And so they did.
Friday, Jul 12th 2002 (11:50pm)
Sundays are such a drag - gotta go back to work the next morning, gotta do laundry, gotta do the grocery shopping... apart from football (when in season), the only thing Sundays are good for is the weekly regurgitation of all the religious crap I've come across for the week. With that loving endorsement, let us commence:
Amazingly, I haven't turned into a smoking pile of lightning-bait just yet, so here's the links!
Sin Virus Warning | Nice Eulogy, Father | Christ Phone
Satan's Dad | Priests Abuse Nuns | Church Lady
Sunday, Jul 7th 2002 (12:07am)
Open your hearts to the divine.. uh.. divinity of the ritualistic.. oh whatever, here's the Sunday post:
Wow, that was horrible. Now, on to the linky goodness!
Church Celebrates Chainsaws | Christian Cowboys
Jesus Rocks Nads | Robo Priest | Christian Porno
Satan's LiveJournal | Female Chinese Christ | Vatican Time Machine
Sunday, Jun 30th 2002 (1:53am)
There are those who would say that my weekly mockery of all things religious might come back to haunt me in the form of, say, eternal damnation or being plagued by computer problems. To those people, I say GET REAL, I'm suffering computer problems because I had the audacity to try and upgrade my system, an endeavor which NEVER goes smoothly, whether I thumb my nose at the Pope or not. With that said, I'm having computer problems this weekend so the Sunday links are gonna be a little thin. Deal with it. If it leaves you unfulfilled, I recommend you go moon a couple of churches. At noon. After eating curry.
Now, on to the paltry selection of links!
Jesse Ventura Wrestles God | God Blinds Masturbator
Sunday, Jun 23rd 2002 (12:29am)
By Mark E. Petersen
Council of the 12 Apostles
Be assured that you can be cured of your difficulty. Many have been, both male and female, and you can be also if you determine that it must be so.
This determination is the first step. That is where we begin. You must decide that you will end this practice, and when you make that decision, the problem will be greatly reduced at once.
But it must be more than a hope or a whish, more than knowing that it is good for you. It must be actually a DECISION. If you truly make up your mind that you will be cured, then you will have the strength to resist any tendencies which you may have and any temptations which may come to you.
After you have made this decision, then observe the following specific guidelines:
Read More to be on your way to a masturbation free life.
Thursday, Jun 20th 2002 (12:12am)
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Today we have not one but TWO things to celebrate: Sunday and Father's Day! In honor of my Dad, who has a wicked sense of humor but frowns on vulgarity just for shock value, today's religious joke is a tame one. Try not to look at the picture next to it, Dad. Happy Father's Day!
And now, on to the sacred linkitude!
Beatles/Satan Connection | Blasphemous Clipart | Atheist Parents
FFRF Quiz | Church of Spongebob Squarepants | Toast Bible
Sunday, Jun 16th 2002 (12:12am)
And the Lord said "Let there be computers, and an operating system that blesses the user with the blood and crash protection of My Son".
And there were computers, and there was an OS... and the Lord said "It is Good..." because the OS was Jesux.
Sunday, Jun 9th 2002 (12:05pm)
Sundays just keep getting bigger and better here at the davelog. Since I've started going out of my way to make the Sunday post... um... better, my hate mail has increased tenfold - which says to me that I should keep running with it. Let's go.
Oh, that was bad. We'd better get to the links, fast.
Things Creationists Hate | Demon Buster | Patron Saint Of Magic
Underage Catholic Wrestlemania | Jesus Shoots! He Scores!
Pancakes Without Preaching | Top Ten Commandments
D.I.Y. Weeping Madonna | God's LiveJournal | Butter Last Supper
Sunday, Jun 9th 2002 (12:18am)
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Over the past few weeks, the traditional Sunday religion post has been degenerating into a festival of offensiveness - and I have no problem with that. Let's continue down that spiral with hearty gusto!
Delightful, yes? Let's get on with the links - there's a lot of them this week!
Stripper For God | Rod Of Correction | Jewish Space Dilemma | Peanut Jesus
Church Of Mary | Battleground God | Fire Bible | Holy Shit
Cremation is NOT Christian | God Saves The Titanic
Sunday, Jun 2nd 2002 (12:05am)
Sunday again, and that means it's time to get yer holy on - and since I got so many complaints about last week's religious joke, I think I'm gonna make it a regular item for the Sunday post. Nyeah nyeah.
A priest, a lawyer, and a policeman are visiting an orphanage on career day. Without warning, a fire suddenly begins to spread through the halls.Let's get to the linky goodness! On your knees!
God Hates America | Hinjews | Monkee Fans For Christ
Sunday, May 26th 2002 (12:01am)
Yep, it's Sunday again, time for a fresh spate of divine linkage to inspire you for another week - but first, my man m0j0 told me a great one a few days ago, and I'm passing it along to you, the dedicated spiritual reader:
Q: What's the difference between Jesus and a painting of Jesus?
A: It only takes 1 nail to hang a painting of Jesus.
On to the links!
Exorcism Tips - How To Make God Puke - Punks and Skins For Christ - Beating Satan, Not Your Penis - Resigning Pope - The Sin Of Breastfeeding
Sunday, May 19th 2002 (12:26am)
When I'm not working (thanks again, Jason), I'm surfing the web, looking for links to post up here. Over the course of a week, I bank all the religious stuff I find up for one big post to fill you Sunday readers with spiritual guidance. So, without further ado, here's this week's spread:
Christians For Cannibis - Priests Gone Wild - Spider-Man's Greatest Bible Stories - Where Is God? - Pope Chart - Harry Potter Chick Tract - Heeb Magazine
Sunday, May 12th 2002 (1:55am)
Welcome to Davelog 2.0! Round these parts, we spend our Sundays with our eyes buried in religious readin', so let us commence!
Eunuch Jesus Caught with Naked Man in The Act - Priests Gone Wild - Landover Baptist Shutdown - Mrs. Antichrist - Landover Baptist NYTimes Ad -
Sunday, Apr 28th 2002 (12:17am)
How often do you change your sheets?
Nothing! Player's off!
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